Love in Action 2

Expressing love, feeling love, writing love, drawing love and are things done frequently but none of them show love.  This came to mind while I was scrolling through some blog posts and  saw the iconic graphic design of the word love on a post (I haven’t been able to find it to link).  Anyhoo, I thought, this design, like the I Heart NY graphic design by Milton Glaser, is an often duplicated image but it in no way communicates what love is. That got me to thinking – how do we show love?

Here are two recent small love actions in my continuing love story with my husband.

#1 – The phone rang during a powerful thunderstorm this morning.  I didn’t pick it up.  I was on the bed, surrounded by pillows with a cover over my head. I hate thunderstorms! Growing up in St. Louis which has frequent, notorious, and damaging thunder storms, I don’t “play” with storms.  I won’t talk on the phone, use the computer or turn on the faucet during T-storms.  I find lightning, frightening.

After the storm passed, I went to the phone to see who’d called.  It was my husband who’d called to say that he was checking to see if I was okay, that he knows I hate thunderstorms and that he loved me.  This is love in action.

#2 – A week or so ago, during a period where we were roiled with uncertainty about husband’s livelihood and just feeling low, I noticed my husband going to work in clothes that were rumpled and to me, broadcast loudly, “I don’t care.”

I got him to pick another shirt, asked him to strip, and ironed the shirt and pants.  “You’re too handsome a guy to look like you don’t care,” I said.  He thanked me (a little grumpily because I’d delayed his departure).  When he returned from work, he said he’d gotten a compliment on how “crisply put together” he looked.  He then thanked me for real.

This is love in action

  • Sometimes done because times are good,

  • sometimes because it’s just how you do things,

  • sometimes to break the ice in a cool time,

  • sometimes done to make up after an argument,

  • sometimes to find love again,

  • sometimes because love has been renewed…

Small loving things we do for our loved ones are important.  In one of the self-help books I read a long time ago during a period of drought when I was hoping for love, Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote that the way to renew a love is by being loving.  He recounted a man asking him, how do you find love again with a wife who you’ve stopped loving.  Dr. Dyer said, “Love her.”  I never forgot that (and I apologize that I can’t find the direct quote)  But I’m sure you get it. 

You find love, renew love, generate love, by loving.

Love in action.

About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

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2 thoughts on “Love in Action

  • Diane fit to the finish

    This is excellent. I don’t know if you have ever read the book “Love Languages,” but it talks about the different ways we perceive love, and how to serve our spouses, friends and children so they feel loved. The book has an interesting premise. When I read your post, I realized that’s what your husband did for you during the storm, and what you did for him by “fixing him up.” Sometimes I forget to show my love for my hubby in a way he will appreciate.

    By the way, thanks for the comment on my blog the other day. We were out of town at the time, but I wanted to check out your site!

  • Candelaria

    I haven’t heard of the book.  Thank for letting me know about it.  I will check it out.  I’m glad you liked my post.