My feet are pretty big – note I didn’t say too big. Too big is a judgment call. Real big is the reality.
I’m writing this piece because I saw a young woman look at my newly pedicured feet and notice how big they were. When she saw me see her looking, she gave me an embarrassed smile. “That’s alright, sweetheart,” I said. “I know I have big feet.” And I chuckled to myself.
My feet grew each time I had children – from size 9 before children to size 11 after. That wouldn’t be so bad if I had thin, elegant feet or even medium, regular feet. My feet are w i d e. I have big, wide, sturdy peasant feet (not that there’s anything wrong with that).
I keep them groomed and don’t have corns or bunions (you can’t make a “salad” with my feet)! I started getting pedicures about 15 years ago when nail shops began opening up in neighborhoods all across Boston and pedicures suddenly became available at affordable rates. Before then, going to a salon for a manicure and pedicure was more of a luxury, special occasion kind of thing
My feet are harky-sharky or is it harnky-sharnky? I don’t know what that phrase means but it’s been used to describe my feet.
My brother says I have feet like Minnie Mouse. (In my family, teasing is an act of love.)
A few years back, my sister found a rare photo of us when we were under 5. We’re sitting on a couch next to my aunt and uncle, and, well…you see the soles of my big shoes before you notice me. My brother, who also got a copy of the photo, teased me. “You had Minnie Mouse feet even then,” he laughed. I love my brother. He’s a tease!
Having big feet has saved me from having the shoe addiction that most of the women I know enjoy. I don’t get excited when I see a shoe warehouse because I know at most they’ll have maybe 5 pairs of shoes that will fit my “dogs” and they won’t be the most fashionable.
My shoe choices have widened in recent years because of the internet but I’m a person who likes to try on shoes. I miss the Designer Shoes showroom that used to be on Newbury Street (the website just doesn’t do it for me). .
The only stores I can go to get shoes off the rack are The Avenue (the few branches that carry a small selection of shoes) and Payless. At least their affordable.
Sounds like I’m lamenting but I’m not. I love my big feet because:
- They’re the only feet I’ve ever known.
- They carry this lush, voluptuous body of mine every where I want to go.
- They helped me play a mean game of kick-ball in my girlish days.
- They have saved me untold thousands of dollars because I can’t partake in the craziness of buying shoes…I will never know the pleasure or expense of designer shoes by the likes of Manolo Blahnik or Jimmy Choo.
- They can play a mean game of footsies – more feet means more pleasure spots.
- If I wanted to have a decorative design painted on my big toe, I’d have plenty of room.
Now, don’t y’all go looking at my feet first when you meet me! Okay?
Hey, If I were a man, big feet would be considered an asset (y’all know you know what I mean although that myth isn’t always true).
Fats Waller* sang the most well-known version of the song, “Your Feet’s Too Bit.” It was written by Ada Benson and Fred Fisher and recorded by in 1939. Chubby Checker, The Beatles, and Mos Def among others, have recorded it as well, but the Fats Waller original is my favorite!
(If this link doesn’t work, go to YouTube and you can find a video of him singing this song.)