I’ve decided to start believing my husband when he answers my questions at warp (sp?) speed. I will believe that he has heard the question in its entirety. I will trust that he has carefully thought about his answer before he utters it. I will know that the answer given is his final answer.
Even though his answers often come with such a quickness that I find it hard to believe that they have received any analysis, I will not repeat the question. I do not want to hear him say, “I said yes, didn’t I?” again.
Perhaps it is because he was a member of the track team (and still moves fast). Perhaps it is because he was on the debate team in high school. Or maybe it’s just that he’s a fairly smart guy – Latin School and Ivy league college grad and all that implies. Whatever the reason – his brain and the training it has recieved during his life allow him to digest questions from his wife virtually the same time that they are posed.
If I truly believed, I wouldn’t seek dialogue and discussion. I could take the answer and run with it. I could tuck the yesses in a basket and pull them out when I need them. I wouldn’t be annoyed that a question or idea or date made in the recent past would be forgotten and that I’d have to remind him, “But you said, yes…okay…got it…didn’t you?”
It’s hard out here for a wife
whose husband – the love of her life –
gives yesses she doesn’t believe
have been thoughtfully conceived.
I’mon learn.
