As a mother whose children live over yonder, there comes a time when phone conversations and emails won’t do, no matter how frequent. I need face-to-face time with those two children of mine. When I see their faces, I will know what’s really going on – not what they tell me – which is often what they think I want to hear.
The web cam helps, but only my daughter and I use them and we do so infrequently. I need to see my children in their homes and habitats. I want to accompany them on their neighborhood runs. See where they work. Meet the people who inhabit their corner of the world.
I need, also, to be silent with them – watching one of our favorite movies, going on a bargain hunt, or taking a long walk. I need their hugs, teasing, and reminiscences. I want to cook some of their favorite dishes and listen as they sing my praises. It was a pleasure to have them together during the holidays. The times we are all together are infrequent and sometimes marred by recurring tensions that surface between them.
Being a mother is the greatest job I’ve ever had and it is the crowning achievement of my life. They have lifted me sky high with pride and knocked me low to the ground with worry. Still I would choose to have them all over again even if I couldn’t go back wiser with the knowledge I’ve gained in hindsight.
I love them so deeply. I carry them daily in my heart, mind and soul.
I need…
I hope…
I plan to lay my eyes on and wrap my arms around them real soon.
(Kees, kees, kees)