It is What It Is! 22

So now we have the latest, annoying phrase du jour: “it is what it is…”
This is one is getting on my last nerve.  I’m hearing it from too many people, in too many instances where it’s not a reaonsable response to the situation nor it is an apt summation of what’s being discussed.

They say, “It is what it is.”

I don’t say but think, “No, it isn’t (except I usually think, “Naw, it ain’t.”)

It is what you make it.
It is what you accept.

Friends and acquaintances say this phrase with a shrug of their shoulders.
As soon as they utter the words, responsibility goes out the window, analysis takes a powder, and their acceptance and inaction take root.

This shouldn’t be.

It is what it is means
 the ball is in someone else’s court, not mine.

 I acquiese, I accept.

It is what it is lets
 me off the hook
absolves me of any part in the particulars.

I didn’t do nothin’, I can’t do nothin’, I’m not going to say a thing.  I won’t engage, I won’t protest, I’m powerless, it’s not my fault…’cause
it is what it is.

I’m coming real close to loathing this phase and want to give a good shake to the people who say it  ’cause it just feels so sad to see people let go, become wet noodles, and be passive.

(Although, although, sometimes, sometimes….occasionally, I, too, feel like letting go,  surrendering to the way things are, succumbing to the probabilities rather than working toward the possibilities.  When these feelings overtake me, I take a nap, say a prayer, have a brief pity-party or put on some good music and dance, until I feel renewed.)

It is what it is until I/we change it, alter it, upset it, topsy-turvy it, work around it, get through it…
Do It To It!

About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

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