Just Pick Up and Go! 5

Have you ever found yourself unexpectedly in an airport or train station and thought to yourself – I could just pick up and go some where?  Perhaps you’re waiting on a friend when the thought occurs to you that you could just up and go…disappear.  Such was the urge that came over me when I walked through South Station after a meeting nearby.  I love sitting and watching the hustle and bustle of the people at the station.  (So what if I munched on a delicious cupcake from Rosie’s Bakery counter while there?)  I love hearing the announcements as trains arrive and depart.  I get a kick trying to figure out where the people there are going and making up stories about who they are, what they do, and why they’re travelling.

The urge to leave was almost overwhelming.  I could just pick up and go; I have enough money to buy a train ticket somewhere, I thought.

I wasn’t feeling unhappy or unsettled or angry.   There was no one I wanted to go see at that moment.  It was just an instinct to be spontaneous and anonymous and move.  I resisted the urge because I’ve become too practical.  I wanted to go and not tell anyone.  And that’s just not something I’ve done in a very long time.

I once hitched to NYC and no one knew I was going.  This was back in my college days when lots of people hitched and it felt safer.  Still it was dangerous, I had very little money in pocket and these were pre-cellphone, pre-credit card days.  My girlfriend who went to Sarah Lawrence College was sure surprised to see me at her door. Crazy! Crazy!  But a memory that will give me a few chuckles in my old age (and does so now in my middler years).

One of the ways I satisfy this recurring urge, is to go on long walks after I’ve taken the T somewhere.  I’ll explore a new neighborhood, finding a place to eat and exploring a bookstore, library, gallery or thrift store if there’s one nearby.  I like the idea of being some place where nobody knows me and no one expects anything of me.

I can just be with myself and by myself without the distracting chatter or desires of others.  The love for and need for solitude may explain why I sometimes feel acutely alone in this isolation of my own making.  What I like best is to be near chatter, laughter, and people but not be in the middle of them.  Off to the side, joining and retreating at will.  Is that weird?

About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

5 thoughts on “Just Pick Up and Go!

  • Paula

    Not weird at all! One of my favorite things to do is to just get in my car and drive (although it’s less environmentally responsible than you taking a train). I’d look at a map until I found a place with a vague reason to visit, and off I’d go. I haven’t done it in a while as it’s best done on my own, and I don’t think it’s fair to my significant other to just pick up and go for hours at a time (we’re a one-car family), but it’s good for clearing the mind, exploring a new place, and practicing my singing all my old favorite tunes.

    I’ve got the day off today, maybe I’ll hit the road.


  • Jennifer

    Ah, this blog post sounds exactly like something I would write, really! I’ve dreamed about working in South Station because I love the bustle and transition. This is partly why I love to travel. I love being in airports, being around other people waiting to go to destinations all over the place and the thought of being in this place of transition that is so natural and so freeing.

  • cheryl

    Usually when I get the urge to go I’m running from something instead of to something. I’ve been experiencing a lot of that lately with school and all. I think of the famous bumper sticker,” No matter where you go. There you are.” Sigh…

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