Plugging My Ears 4

I’ve been looking online for ear plugs but the type I’m searching for haven’t been brought to market yet.

I’m looking for ear plugs to keep me from hearing the wishes and woes of family and friends.  My heart and mind snatch their words and turn them into actionable items…things that have to do.  If there’s nothing I feel I can do, then I add the wishes and woes to my pile of worries.  I have worries for myself, worries for those closest to me, worries for others, and worries for the world in general.  This pile is growing so huge, it threatens to morph into a mountain.  I feel overloaded.  I can feel myself holding my breath again.  (I’d actually begun to exhale at some point not so very long ago.)

There’s a saying, “if you’re going to worry why pray and if you’re going to pray why worry?”  I know this, I know this, but it is hard not to do both overtime.  I’m trying to believe there’ll be a lifting, that things will be fine in 2009.

The January blahs don’t help.  The Christmas and New Year’s holidays and the various celebrations and gatherings are over until next year.  The weather is cold and dreary with dirty snow on the ground and more snow forecast.  The days are too short.  If I can just hold on, by the end of the month, the days will begin to lengthen.  The upcoming historic inaugural events will surely buoy my spirit.

Meanwhile, I’ve got a jar full of cotton balls that will have to do the trick.

About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

Leave a Reply

4 thoughts on “Plugging My Ears

  • Jim

    I think a lot of us are piling up that mountain of woe together. And just for a bit of refreshment, the daylight is already getting longer, we usually get a January thaw, we often get a February thaw and thankfully the holidays are over, finally, no more preparation. Spring is definitely on the way in and Bush is definitely on the way out. Cheer up.

  • LeeAnn

    I’m betting that you are a caring, compassionate friend and that those in your circle are lucky to have your ear. On the other hand – headphones work really well when you want solitude and quiet.

  • Karsha

    First Happy New Years and second when I read this I thought seriously that you were talking about me. It has taken me years to work out my caretaker instincts. I’ve had to learn I can’t fix “everyones” problems even though I honestly tried! Please take extra good care of yourself in this new year, you deserve it! p.s. the days are getting a little longer!!!