Tidy-widy, Uptight 2

I find myself in regular encounters with people who have tidy lives and are so far removed from my messy, over-wrought reality that we might as well be living on separate planets (except we aren’t…we are all in this together.)  I call them the tidy-widys.*

They come from plenty even though some of them don’t quite realize how having plenty paves their way and makes them who they are.

Plenty means that, for them, there is:

  • Always enough money to pay the bills in full (no carry-over debt for them)
  • Money to travel when they want (or need) to
  • Well-resourced neighborhoods or suburbs or bucolic  towns
  • Weekend and vacation homes to gather with family and friends and to get-away from the every-day
  • Fully-resourced organizations with positive bottom lines and uber-efficient staff (who take care of those messy details)
  • Cleaners to clean their private messes
  • Money to pay their bills (always)

Many of them have had this lifestyle/position/world-view from their grand and great-grandparents forward.  Others have only achieved this status in their lifetimes and never look back to what they’ve survived.

My observations are not necessarily negative in and of themselves except when you have to work with them and::

  • Listen to  them eschewing others who don’t have what they have
  • Witness their sanctimoniousness because people don’t roll the way they roll
  • Shudder that they are making decisions that impact those of us whose lives don’t allow us to be as tidy.

While writing this, the opening lines to Stevie Wonder’s hit song, Uptight: Everything’s All Right, popped into my mind, although he was singing about something entirely different when he sang:

 Baby, ev’rything is all right, uptight, clean out-of-sight.**

For the tidy-widys, everything is:

All right


Clean and


Later in the song, Stevie Wonder  sings “No one is better than I, I know, I’m just an average guy.”

I’m gonna have to keep reminding myself of this fact and not let the tidy-widys get to me.



** Performed by Stevie Wonder (Uptight: Everything’s All Right, 1966)

If you liked this post, you might also like:

Money Luck (At the end of this post is a link to an essay I wrote, “I Hate Those Women.” – it is relevant to this post.)






About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

Leave a Reply

2 thoughts on “Tidy-widy, Uptight

  • JB Gatling

    This post touched a cord as I read it, reminding me of the many past times where I was in the presence of the Tidy-widy crowd ( a mixed race assembly). It takes fortitude oftentimes to even open the doorway to begin a meeting or to engage in conversation. But that feeling dissipates if we take a deep breath and focus on our own strengths, our personal journey and the reality that we will keep on keeping on, just as our ancestors continued to due.

    • Candelaria Silva Post author

      Thank you for taking the time to read and leave thoughtful and wise comments about my post, JB. My head nearly exploded recently when I heard some comments and saw the dismissal of an organization that was woefully under-resourced by the tidy-widy set.