To Gossip or Not 2

Have you ever had a tidbit or a big-bit of gossip that was so delicious, so wicked, so full-of-places for you to be judgmental and tsk-tsk that you could hardly wait to tell it to somebody?  Such has been my condition for the past week.  After I heard the juciness that was dropped on me, unbidden I might add, two thoughts struck me simultaneously:

  1. Oooh-oooh-oooh!
  2. What good would it possibly do to share this gossip?

Hmmm.  The second thought stopped me in my tracks.

“Okay,”  I said to myself.  “Swallow. See, that wasn’t so hard. You ‘re strong.  You can keep it to yourself.”

This worked for a few hours until the urge to share it bubbled back up to the surface.

Maybe I’ll just tell my husband.  He knows the principals in the story.  I could share…if I dare.

“Yeah,” other inner-voice said, but, even with him, “What good would it do to share?  It’s a sad piece of human conduct and you don’t need to be part of spreading yet another tale of someone you know doing something bad, naughty, stupid and despicable.” 

That makes perfectly good sense, really, it does, but, let me tell you, it’s been a struggle.   I’ve been wrestling with it. 

It’s so, well, gossipy.

Surely I would be given a free-pass to tell my husband.  Right? 
I mean husbands and wives are supposed to share everything – aren’t we?

So far,  I haven’t told him yet.  If he reads this blog-entry and asks me, I’ll…I’ll…just say no.

And I haven’t really told you-all (readers of this blog, you know, you all) anything.  I only told you that I had some gossip to tell, that doesn’t count as gossiping, does it?


About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

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2 thoughts on “To Gossip or Not

  • miruspeg

    I fail miserably in this area. But you have certainly given me food for thought. Hopefully next time a hear some gossip I will be able to stop and ask myself your second question.

  • Candelaria

    Thanks for leaving a comment.  It’s a constant struggle not to spread gossip even when we are sorry for the plight of the people whose stories we spread.