Trying to meditate 2

Stumble down the stairs.  Open the blinds or keep them closed. Turn off the front and back porch lights.

Set timer.  10 minutes or 15 – up from the 5 you started at.  Rush to the living room couch, grab the blanket you pull over your head and start.

First with a prayer.  The Lord’s prayer.  The one you know throughout your being.

Then breathe.  Breathe in, two, three, four and out, two, three, four

(You know this breathing pattern is one you’ve retained from Lamaze classes and employ whenever you need to calm or slow down.)  In, 2, 3, 4 (nostrils); out, 2, 3, 4 (mouth).

Then the sound:  ommmm, Ommmm.

Doesn’t work for long so you switch to words:

  • Love – 2, 3, 4, love 2, 3, 4.

  • Joy – 2, 3, 4, joy 2, 3, 4.

  • Peace -2, 3, 4, peace 2, 3, 4.

  • Health (yes, must have that) -2, 3, 4, health, 2, 3, 4.

  • Safety – 2, 3, 4, safety, 2, 3, 4.

  • Back to love.

(Wait… I didn’t pray for the thing I really want and need or prays not the right word… I didn’t meditate on the thing I really want, need.)

Abundance!  2, 3, 4, abundance – 2, 3, 4.

(Come on, Candelaria, say what you really mean!)

Money – 2, 3, 4, money – 2, 3, 4.

(Important clarification –  I don’t want money to come because of anyone’s misfortune. Just hitting the lottery or a publishing a book that sells or something like that.)

Breathe in, 2 3, 4 and out, 2, 3, 4.

Just breathe.

(Interruptions – a car coming down the street, a bird’s call, don’t forget to look up directions to the meeting later.  Shiver-me-timbers, I’m cold.  Pull blanket closer.)

Go back to breathing.

Love in, 2, 3, 4 and love out 2, 3, 4.

(Eat, Pray, Love author?  What’s her name again?  Oh, yes, Elizabeth Gilbert.  Ketut, the Balinese healer she studied with, said to “smile with your whole being” as a way to meditate.  When did I smile last?  How to smile with my whole being? Have I ever done that?)

Smile in, 2, 3, 4 and smile out 2, 3, 4.

BEEEEEEPPPPPPP!  Meditation over for today.

Try again tomorrow.

Scratch that.

DO again

and again

and again.


About Candelaria Silva

Candelaria Silva-Collins is a marketing, community outreach and programming consultant; writer; and trainer/facilitator who lives in Boston, Massachusetts. She has designed and facilitated workshops on a wide variety of topics including communication, facilitation, job search skills, team building, and parenting issues. She currently coordinates the Community Membership Program of the Huntington Theatre Company. Her work as Director of ACT Roxbury was profiled in several publications, including The Creative Communities Builders Handbook. Candelaria’s children’s stories, short stories, essays and reviews have been published in local and national publications and she is an active blogger. Her publications include the booklets, Handling Rejection; Pushing through Shyness: Networking Tips when You’re Shy, Slow to Warm Up or Just don’t Feel you Belong; and Real Questions about Sex & Relationships for Teens: A Discussion Guide for Parents. She has served on the boards of Goddard College, Wheelock Family Theatre, Boston Foundation for Architecture, and Discover Roxbury. She is currently Chair, Designators of the Henderson Foundation.

Leave a Reply

2 thoughts on “Trying to meditate

  • Peggy

    Oh this post put a big big smile on my dial Candelaria!
    I am now meditating 15 minutes a day with a timer and would love to know how to quieten my thoughts.
    The birds were very noisy today while I was meditating but if I wasn’t meditating I probably wouldn’t have noticed their lovely songs.
    Namaste and love and hugs
    Peggy ♥♥♥