Have you ever bought yourself an armful of flowers and put them in every vase, vessel, jar or glass you have throughout your home?
Have you? Have you done it just for you? (And not because company was coming.)
Have you ever eaten, in solitude, a perfect dinner, on your best plate/china, with your best crystal goblet brimming with your special liquid pleasure, and candlelight, and a cloth napkin with soft music playing in the background just ‘cause you feel like it and who deserves it more than you?
Have you savored a meal, really listened to a song, soaked in a bath, noticed the beauty of the path you are walking, absorbed the feel of the hand you are holding even if it is your own?
If you have not – why not? Shame on you. Get to it!
Fall in love with yourself. This is the love that allows all other loves.
Love your life even if you’re working to make it better, more, less, secure or stable.
Despite the pain I’ve been for the last few days (hence my hiatus) there have been some things I’ve loved.
Food – I steamed swordfish and topped it with a sauce of white wine/butter/capers/parsley and seasoning. I accompanied this with a simple green salad. It was the first time I’d cooked swordfish and it was sublime. The fish moist, the sauce flavorful, the salad fresh.
Literature – I finished my fourth book by Eddy Harris and picked up Eat, Pray, Love. I am in love with this book and the only reason I am not reading it now instead of writing these words is that I tore through the first third of it in less than 10 hours and am forcing myself to savor it through the weekend because I will crave it once it’s finished.
Music – My husband is gathering the holiday music and I will be filling the house with carols, old and new. I love holiday music! I want to have people over or go somewhere and sing Christmas songs; not just sing them but belt them out!
Tradition – The first two batches of Christmas and holiday cards are addressed. It is my yearly hello to friends-family-acquaintances. And I beat my cousin this year. He got my card first because I mailed his card the day after Thanksgiving!
Things to look forward to – Babyface concert; leading a Discover Roxbury holiday shopping tour; a good friend coming in town unexpectedly for a visit; a photography exhibit of works by Charles Teenie Harris, Jr.; a friend who’s a real gourmet has invited me & T to dinner; my third anniversary (!); the ebbing of pain; and seeing my sweet granddaughter soon.
There really is joy all around despite all the other stuff that is not joy. Those things will wait for other entries and moods.
But right now, the only person I can think of who deserves to be in love with themself more than me is you! Have at it.