If we had really understood, do you think we would have ended up here?
- Barely visible
Untethered to a child (we had none)
A partner (we never committed)
A sibling (we were only children or distanced ourselves from sisters and brothers)
Family (we left on the fastest transport out of our hometowns and stayed gone)
- Stuck in the miniscule
Too frequently looking back, reviewing triumphs long past
Hoping to revive them or “the times that used to be”**
Trying to figure out:
- where the fork was in the road
- the wrong choice made
- the wrong person loved and invested in
Embittered by old envies and rivalries with others who might have been friends/partners/companions/champions
Systems of oppression played a part but are not the reason for our pooring
We are a tribe of women
who should have done better, who could have done better, who certainly knew better but didn’t do better and now the clock is ticking loudly and the alarm is about to ring.
We took our talents and youth for granted
We stayed on a compound of our own creation
afraid to and uncertain of how to break free
thinking opportunities would be endless
We believed the hype instead of the action holding on to ideologies that only served the progenitors and did nothing for the followers
We followed even as we gradually grew alone and lonely
Who looks after the faithful, the cadre, the reliable?
We ignored the samples/advice of parents, grandparents, teachers, and counselors, and the enslaved ancestors long before:
- Get you a piece of land
- Buy a house
- Put some money away for that rainy day
- Don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing
- Is it a need or a want?
- Can you do without?
- Take care of yourself before you take care of others
- Find somebody to love, you can love somebody you know…
My sisters are pooring
A cautionary tale.
*(Pooring – the gradual and steady diminishment of several Black women I know.)
**The Times they Used to Be is the title of a children’s book by the late, great poet, Lucille Clifton.
The Dichotomy: Those that Have and Those that Have Not by Candelaria Silva